George, aka Jorge: Velociraptor. Smart. Fast. Deadly. Runs around with arms in position to daintily hold two invisible purses.
Adam, aka Sid: Sloth. Adam has long born a resemblance to Sid the Sloth from Ice Age.
Gary: Snail. This was a difficult one, but there is a snail in SpongeBob Squarepants, and his name is Gary, and Gary the basketball player moves rather slowly and stays close to the ground.
Scooter: Honey Badger. You think Scooter cares? He really doesn’t give a darn. He has no regard for any other basketball player, whatsoever. Pretty much does what he wants.
Kerry: Hookworm. That’s an animal which happens to have “hook” in the name. Plus Kerry is pretty good at getting rebounds, like Dennis Rodman, aka, “The Worm”.
Jacob: Hyena. Laughing Hyena. Jacob laughs hysterically during game-play.
Phil: Giraffe. Because he is tall, and also because giraffes are excellent shooters. Ok, just because he is tall.
That last one was a reach, but there must be more. Darin, Jimbo and Erik all have yet to be compared to animals. Please make additions to this list in the comments.
Traffic to this blog continues to come mostly from women searching for pickup lines for basketball players… Lunchsketball trails only Yahoo! Answers and GotLines.com in the google results for basketball pickup lines… Repeating the phrase “pickup lines for basketball players” here in this article can’t be expected to change the situation…
Player of the Week:
Congratulations Alex! Alex is a friend of Jourge’s, and he has played maybe twice. Alex wins Player of the Week for his heroics on Friday. After carrying his team to a half-time lead, Alex took an excruciatingly painful nut-shot. He never left the court, but courageously limped back and forth between the 3-point lines for the rest of the game, in too much pain to look up, much less catch a pass. His team, affected by this show of perseverance, pulled together and finished with a win. As Ray Zalinsky once said, send over a bottle of bubbly in a bucket of ice…